RESEARCH TREATMENTS

Thank you for looking at this for me.
I'll try to get on it myself. Soon.

CR

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But nothing is attached--Freudian slip?


NS

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r u sure you don't mind doing this?
I  CAN do it.

CR

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No, I don't mind, but where is the information of what i have to look up?  You haven't sent me anything still.  I know you CAN do it.  I don't mind doing it though.  Don't know how deeply I will understand the science, but I have a better natural understanding than you do probably.

NS

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Thank you for checking this out.
I think if I were a friend of mine, and I was asked to look into this, it would add gloom and stress to my life.
SO, I want YOU to know that I am aware of your help and understand that it needs strength to listen to me talk about my situation. And I thank you and appreciate it.

I KNOW that ultimately I have to do this stuff.
I am moving at zero miles an hour right now.
My thoughts are... don't organize... to propel me.

CR

SUPERMAN

Hi,

Inspired by your generous, compassionate and always on the mark professional advice, I went to see (A PLAY downtown)
last night. It actually wasn't so hard. Ultimately I felt it was better to know how it turned out and to constructively evaluate how I might have approached it differently. I was surprised (and it eased the sting a little) to see that I was mentioned in the special thanks section.

Anyway, I always hear your voice in my head when doing theater things that are positive and community orientated rather than bitter and resentful.

How are you?

OV

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Dear OV,

That was good of you (and difficult) and thanks for saying that about me.

My thought is...
I think that if have a pure and true vision of what you want to accomplish as an artist you're superman.
The nerdiest people (i have discovered) have accomplished a lot because it was about their purpose and believing in themselves and not getting weighed down in resentments. There is a lightness about them, other people are attracted to it.

And things change, there are opportunities for people who aren't weighed down by anger or frustration and have been honing their vision. (I have a problem with purpose and clarity)

I am not great. (this week) I am taking things a few chores at a time.
I'm not looking at anything too closely just sticking to what is in front of me.
Church helps, Doctors are scary.(for me about this)

I imagine that I'll write a play?
But, I have to set myself up right, because I've never felt the calling to write like that. I don't have a facility for it.
But ultimately I need to create to keep going.

I feel better when I am out of the apartment.
I stopped working and am on unemployment and will sign up for disability any minute now.

CHARLIE

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Hey Charlie,

I think that I DO NOT have a purpose and vision as an artist. I hope that doesn't make me a fraud. I'd like to have one. I frequently feel frustrated by the things I see and the way people act around the work they do.

Do you miss working? Will you be working on your play? Do you want to hang out? I think you are a great writer with a very clear voice and vision. I'm looking forward to getting to read it when (if) you are ready to let me (or anyone). I've always admired your commitment to your creative life. You always are working on something or mindfully aware of your experiences to incorporate them in later work. I envy that about you.

I used to feel very comfortable around doctors because they all reminded me of my dad. But not now. There are a lot of reasons for that. Anyway...the way you described your specialist doctor on your blog (how's that going by the way?) made him seem sensitive. Maybe he is not. Regardless, it's terrible that you are going through this. It sounds like church brings you some peace.

OW

HEALING from Deepak Chopra

My soul can lead me to healing. I will become one with my true self. With this first affirmation we begin the healing process. From there ninety-nine other expressions of spirit follow, one for each day. All together they summarize the process of emotional and spiritual healing. They shift our attention from the external world to the inner world, which is the source of light.

Suffering threatens to make life meaningless. That is its greatest danger, not the pain it inflicts. It is up to each of us to restore meaning. Doctors cannot do it for us with their medicine; friends cannot do it for us with their solace and comfort. You are healed when you can say to yourself, “I matter, I belong, I am worthy, I am safe, I can express myself, I am loved.”

Inner healing involves moving from darkness to the light. “Light” is a word that has different meanings yet is generally understood as love and understanding. Love nurtures the emotional body; understanding fills the voids created by pain.

As you contact your true self, you will discover that the soul is not passive. Spirit knows more about us than we do ourselves, and it wants to support our every step toward wholeness. The soul journey has been called the pathless path because there is no map.

Every person’s steps are different. But the great wisdom traditions have told us a multitude of helpful things about spirit.

Light has the power to fill the void afflicted by darkness. Healing yourself comes in two stages – releasing the energy of suffering, then replacing it with the soul’s energy. It is a gentle process, very much like holding on to a thread as it leads you from step to step. What begins as the merest hint of new strength will grow. Your true self is always available to meet any challenge, find any answer, and show you the way out of any dilemma.

Adapted from The Deeper Wound: Recovering the Soul from Fear and Suffering, by Deepak Chopra (Harmony Books, 2001).

More on Deepak Chopra's Tips (395 articles available)
More from Deepak Chopra (406 articles available)

At Church tonight,

Disease is material, material has no mind, no power. Mind has power.

Disease is error, error is evil, when we dismiss the belief and face down the fear, healing takes place.

There is only good. There is only power in good.

Evil isn't real, it is nothing. Allow evil to go back to where it came from, nothingness.

Do not fight your opposition, know yourself and allow G-d on his thrown to take care of the rest.

Christ said "Be not afraid" Rejoice! Rejoice!

Disease is fear on the body. What are you afraid of?

gentle workout

Mattie,

I did about 30 minutes of gentle motion exercises in the tub.

And about 45 on the carpet.

This seemed to help. The gentle exercises work in that, I feel more together and have a little more energy and maybe a little less soreness.

I think the idea for me (for now) is to do sessions of gentle breathing mind-body explorations maybe a few times a day( if I can).

The goal?

To regain comfort, ease, coordination, confidence and balance in my body.

To remind my body that I'm still here, and there is room for growth, there is hope for the re-emergence of, strength and health.

Charlie

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This sounds like a really good plan.
Yes, definitely to the gentle breathing/mind body explorations--and I like your goal.
We do the best we can and hope/trust that God will go along with our plan

Would you consider seeing Homeopath if they thought they could help?? I was jsut thinking about a young boy who was helped greatly when he had some weird neurological symptoms (ticks, uncontrollable movements).

Mattie

ENTRY to win a super cool folding BIKE

I've been cycling and walking to work since I moved to the New York 25 years ago. I like to run too. I've completed two New York marathons.I once bicycled across the country.

I feel independent and healthy on a bike.

This past year has been a difficult year for me. I have a pending diagnosis of a motor neuron disease. I can no longer run. I walk super slow. BUT, I can still ride a bike.
In fact, this is the ONLY way I get around now.

I have on old beater, a yellow '60s Schwinn. Super sturdy, one speed, heavy.

I can't take the Schwinn every where though.
So, when I leave the city, I'm stuck. No longer independent healthy biker.
The Strida would solve so many travel problems for me.

For instance, this summer, I have a short film showing at a festival in Cape Cod. Walking around Woods Hole would be ideal, but cycling could be good too. Just fold it up and bring it on the train to Boston, unfold it to get the bus to the Cape and I'm off to my festival. The Strida would save me from being dependent on other people.

Perfect solution for me!

By the way, I plan to get better.